April 14, 2024

Let me be clear: I’ve by no means performed a Last Fantasy sport. Last Fantasy VII Rebirth could also be out very quickly, and the collection could also be one of the crucial influential within the historical past of video video games, however I’ve by no means touched one. Apart from tangential data gleaned in opposition to my will by way of the web and coworkers, and what I’ve realized after enhancing tales like one describing methods to get FF7 Rebirth’s bonus materia from an previous save, or one other lauding a brand new fan weblog whose total raison d’etre is arguing that FF8 is the most effective, I’m the Jon Snow of Last Fantasy. I do know nothing.

The closest I’ve gotten to the world of Last Fantasy is thru Kingdom Hearts, which can also be the primary time I noticed this character, who I instantly recognized in my little one mind as some kind of goat girl:

Screenshot: Sq. Enix

To be honest to me, I performed Kingdom Hearts on a PlayStation 2 and, due to the format of my childhood basement, sat greater than the really useful distance away from my tv primarily based on its display measurement. I additionally, on the time, wanted glasses and didn’t but comprehend it. However if you happen to’re being sincere, don’t these kinda appear like massive ol’ goat ears? Couldn’t she, realistically, on this world the place Disney characters collide with individuals who have impossibly voluminous hair, be a satyr? Or a bizarre elf? It’s not not attainable!

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It took near twenty years earlier than I spotted that this girl (who I later realized was referred to as Aerith) didn’t have goat ears. That this was, in actual fact, a bow. I’m not the one one that has misinterpret an FF sprite (I’m instructed that you simply all thought this dude was a canine), so is my mistake all that arduous to consider?

A lot of the Kotaku employees thinks my error is one brought on by a mixture of intentional ignorance and, as Ethan Gach places it, “Halo mind.” They’re guffawing in our work Slack about my slight, pointing fingers and laughing at my harmless declare. However they’re incorrect. There are others like me on the market. Others who thought, at one level, that this brunette girl had big-ass ears flanking her pigtails.

As soon as I grew up and stopped taking part in Kingdom Hearts, earlier than I entered this business and have become uncovered to all method of video games and players, Last Fantasy’s up to date graphics had been by no means on my radar. Aerith’s crimson bow is much extra clear within the remake trilogy, with their high-definition graphics and gravity-defying tits, than it’s in Kingdom Hearts—and within the authentic Last Fantasy 7, when the characters had been nonetheless chunky polygonal fashions. However for a very long time, I solely knew her again when it seemed just like the rattling factor was a pair of ears. So, naturally, I assumed that considered one of Last Fantasy VII’s lead characters was some kind of human-goat hybrid girl. This can be a sport franchise that has rideable geese, for fuck’s sake, why can’t Aerith be a goat?

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